Hi Mom,
I missed you. I know I'm very late, but I did think of you the whole day. I was very emo today, haha, very jealous of others who were spending time with their family, esp. their Mothers. I reallly at least wanted to see you in my dream. But I heard that you went to visit Cheng, so for that I am at least happy that you still remember us, and still want to be with us even though we have neglected you for the longest. I'm sorry, we don't mean to. I really wish you were just a drive away or anything; where we can be together. ♥
I know if you were here, I would be the happiest baby in the world! hehe, =D you would love me the most because I am the funniest out of us kids. hehe But now, I am probably the saddest baby ever. But I am happy &grateful to you, you've taught me many things that I would have never known. I am living to make you happyy Mom, I promise.
I love you and thank you for giving birth to me in this world and nothing can repay your love&kindness. The Mom who has the most big heart, the love for us all, hardwork to provide, strength to continue loving us. In my eyes, you are the best mom I could ever asked for. Thank you so much Mom, you saved me and protect me from harm even though you had little strength left. And I am forever grateful for your big heart &love.
Love your baby daughter, Ntxheengyieng, Diana Xiong
Monday, May 9, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Breakdown. MOM?
Jeez huhhhhh,. MOM i miss youu sooo damn much! I wish you here to give me guidance and the love that I need for 20 years now. Everytime, I swear everytime I hear about people talk about their moms, I always say, "cherish and loveeee your MOM to the fullest, you don't know what's it is like to be without a MOM." Or I encourage them to love their MOM and make them see what it is without a MOM!
:( I know and hope that you're in a better place. Everytime I have a dream about you, I never see your face, but in the end I'm happy to have dreamnt of you! I miss the family soo much, especially my two sisters. Everyday I pray for their safety and everyone, esp. Mollyy and her family, my baby and your 1st grandson, baby Evan. MOM please look over us still and protect us. I know haven't done much in my life, but I feel like I'm going through these small and big roads at the same time, really wishing you were here with me, but at the same time I must go on. Sooon, I will have you tatt against me and stay with me close for forever.
ughh, MOM! I'm not blaming youuu, I just really wish you were here. I wish I was there before you went. I heard everything about it, I'm soooo sad and sorryyy! You didn't derserve it, no matter what was said, I'm not listening to anything anyone says, in my heart, I know that Momma was a good person, that is why I'm such a strong person, always wanting to be independent, and I think that was your wish before you left us, esp ME, your baby, Ntxheengyieng Diana Xiong. And I am trying everyday, to make YOU proud and everyone, esp. Grayma.
Right now, I'm going to take the BIGGEST step of my life and live alone and go through college to be a successful person. Yes, Txhujci did do it, and I'm sooo proud of her. I remember when she went away to college, I missed her soo much. Because I knowww and care sooo much for a family and bond that we never had! :( and now Molly and her family are in Colorado, my heart won't stay still, because I care for her and her family sooo much.
MOM, I just want you to know that I became such a generous and grateful baby and daughter. I love everything and I am grateful for everything! I MISSS you sooo much! ugh, all these hardship are nothing, they're for YOU! and everything I LIVE for.!
Please tell DAD and everyone that I'm doing fine, and let them know that I am trying and will never give up.
Thank you.
I MISS YOU SO MUCH MOM!
LOVE &Muah, from you youngest baby,
Ntxheengyieng, Diana Xiong
:( I know and hope that you're in a better place. Everytime I have a dream about you, I never see your face, but in the end I'm happy to have dreamnt of you! I miss the family soo much, especially my two sisters. Everyday I pray for their safety and everyone, esp. Mollyy and her family, my baby and your 1st grandson, baby Evan. MOM please look over us still and protect us. I know haven't done much in my life, but I feel like I'm going through these small and big roads at the same time, really wishing you were here with me, but at the same time I must go on. Sooon, I will have you tatt against me and stay with me close for forever.
ughh, MOM! I'm not blaming youuu, I just really wish you were here. I wish I was there before you went. I heard everything about it, I'm soooo sad and sorryyy! You didn't derserve it, no matter what was said, I'm not listening to anything anyone says, in my heart, I know that Momma was a good person, that is why I'm such a strong person, always wanting to be independent, and I think that was your wish before you left us, esp ME, your baby, Ntxheengyieng Diana Xiong. And I am trying everyday, to make YOU proud and everyone, esp. Grayma.
Right now, I'm going to take the BIGGEST step of my life and live alone and go through college to be a successful person. Yes, Txhujci did do it, and I'm sooo proud of her. I remember when she went away to college, I missed her soo much. Because I knowww and care sooo much for a family and bond that we never had! :( and now Molly and her family are in Colorado, my heart won't stay still, because I care for her and her family sooo much.
MOM, I just want you to know that I became such a generous and grateful baby and daughter. I love everything and I am grateful for everything! I MISSS you sooo much! ugh, all these hardship are nothing, they're for YOU! and everything I LIVE for.!
Please tell DAD and everyone that I'm doing fine, and let them know that I am trying and will never give up.
Thank you.
I MISS YOU SO MUCH MOM!
LOVE &Muah, from you youngest baby,
Ntxheengyieng, Diana Xiong
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Tattoo in my Heart for Momma.
Um, I feel like this is less like a poem, but these words are from my heart and I like it this way, so yeahhhh. I'm planning to get this on my left arm, starting from my shoulder going down on the back of my arm. hehe cool huh? So yeahh, this is a message for my mommyy from the bottom of my heart, I miss her so muchh.
I got to go see her when I was in Minnesota, but it was like during the morning where we were suppose to board our flight back home. And the snow were like thigh-high that we couldn't see her grave stone, but I knew where my mommy was at, my heart told me while my sister and Dad were contemplating about it. Hehe, I tried to dig the snow with the little shovel that we had, I was really determined, but everyone said that we didn't have time, and my heart broke because we all were there to see my Mom for the first time together, not just one at a time, but together. :) I wish I had time to prepare for her meal, all we got her was a breakfast meal from Mcdonalds. I know that wasn't good enough for not seeing my Mom for ten years. I hope you forgive me momma, I miss and love you. :D
Love your youngest baby & daughter,
Aa Bea, Ntxheengyieng, Diana Xiong
To my Mom:
Momma
is
on my arm
lifting me up
every time
Mom will keep me
from harm
throughout my time
even though
I’ve
never met you
Mom,
you will always be
in my
HEART
forever
I love you
Mom
Ntxheengyieng
Sunday, January 30, 2011
New Year Resolutions
I know I'm a little late but ahha it's better then nothing! okay here are my 2011 new year's resolutions:
1. Study hard and pass all my classes. &play later.
2. Go through with soccer class and get to play at tournaments so that my Grandma can watch me
play something that I've always played for a long time, because I failed at 1st place last time. Fightingg!!! :)
3. Be more organized and neat, tidy, aha all those stuffs.
4. Anywhere, anytime, BE EARLY!!! Do not be late!
5. Take my Grandma to somewhere adventurous! hehe ex.Hawaii, Vegas, haha.
6. Do NOT go off course of the path to success;
7. Make more good economic choices than expensive ones! heheh.
8. WAKE UP EARLY!!! starting around 9:30am and then earlier as it goes.
9. Visit my Family more often.
10. And finally be more mature and professional in all areas, especially on speech.
heheh Thank you! :)
love, Geishaaa
1. Study hard and pass all my classes. &play later.
2. Go through with soccer class and get to play at tournaments so that my Grandma can watch me
play something that I've always played for a long time, because I failed at 1st place last time. Fightingg!!! :)
3. Be more organized and neat, tidy, aha all those stuffs.
4. Anywhere, anytime, BE EARLY!!! Do not be late!
5. Take my Grandma to somewhere adventurous! hehe ex.Hawaii, Vegas, haha.
6. Do NOT go off course of the path to success;
7. Make more good economic choices than expensive ones! heheh.
8. WAKE UP EARLY!!! starting around 9:30am and then earlier as it goes.
9. Visit my Family more often.
10. And finally be more mature and professional in all areas, especially on speech.
heheh Thank you! :)
love, Geishaaa
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
A New Start
Welll, I am glad that I went through and talked with my workplace. And yes today was the last day that I will ever go back to that stinky, horrible, ugly serviced restaurant. No more bussing my ass to work hard for only fucken four hours a week, no more feeling bad for the customers who eat at that dumb restaurant! I would not recommend that restaurant for it has bad service and the workers are lazyass bitchessss who only knows how to run their mouths! ahhaha YAAAAY, finally got out of there, and finalllyy fucken no more stress for me, especially when it is unneccessary stress, nopeeee aint my problema and I can carelesss stupid asss son of a bitch workplace! :) I'm thee best worker that you'll ever have, bitchesss!
Heheh, now that is said, time to move on and begin a new year and hopefully full of successs &determination! ;p
Fightinnnggg!
-Geishaaa
Heheh, now that is said, time to move on and begin a new year and hopefully full of successs &determination! ;p
Fightinnnggg!
-Geishaaa
Monday, January 3, 2011
Mother of Life
I woke up around 9:22am, which is two hours behind Minniesota, 11:22am, to the phone call of my sis, Molly. I heard excessive cries and moans in the background and instantly, I knew that my Grandmother had just passed away. I feel sad that I am in a position where I can't really help myself, I don't and didn't have money to fly out to see my Grandmother for the last time of her life and my life. I wish her the peace and love that she deserves. She will truly be missed and loved back here on earth, and I wished her a safe journey to heaven. And I want her to know that I've always loved her and missed her even though I haven't seen her in years, the last time was when I was a 5th grader.
I know that she won't be lonely in heaven because she has my Grandfather and Mother to guide her. And her dreams of wanting and wishing to see my mom for almost 20 years has come,
Yes, Mom and Ntais it has been that long. The baby, Ntxheengyieng that you left behind because you couldn't and didn't have the life and strength to live on earth, has grown and mature into a woman. I am thankful and grateful that you have given life to me. And I am also thankful for Grandmother to birth us both into this world. I hope you are doing fine and hope you are still watching us from up above. I love and miss you tremendously. We all grew up into fine adults, yeah we struggled here and there, and that was the time that we needed you the most, crying out to you asking, "Why did you leave?" and "Why we never got the chance to see you? Bond with you? or Know you?" But Im glad we made it through those times and continued living to make you proud. I couldn't have loved you enough in this lifetime. I miss you and Ntais terribly.
Please be safe and watch over us.
Love, Ntxheengyieng Diana Xiong (Aa Bea)
1/03/2011
I know that she won't be lonely in heaven because she has my Grandfather and Mother to guide her. And her dreams of wanting and wishing to see my mom for almost 20 years has come,
Yes, Mom and Ntais it has been that long. The baby, Ntxheengyieng that you left behind because you couldn't and didn't have the life and strength to live on earth, has grown and mature into a woman. I am thankful and grateful that you have given life to me. And I am also thankful for Grandmother to birth us both into this world. I hope you are doing fine and hope you are still watching us from up above. I love and miss you tremendously. We all grew up into fine adults, yeah we struggled here and there, and that was the time that we needed you the most, crying out to you asking, "Why did you leave?" and "Why we never got the chance to see you? Bond with you? or Know you?" But Im glad we made it through those times and continued living to make you proud. I couldn't have loved you enough in this lifetime. I miss you and Ntais terribly.
Please be safe and watch over us.
Love, Ntxheengyieng Diana Xiong (Aa Bea)
1/03/2011
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